Open RP Post

[forleaving]

🌳 Hit me up on plurk or via PM if you have any questions/want to run an idea by me first/what-have-you.
🌳 General squick/trigger list.
🌳 Prefer m/m for anything shippy, though m/f is also okay.
🌳 General headcanon for Adam. I don't have any yet, will update when I do.
🌳 Adam's kink list.
🌳 This is open to everyone who wants to thread with me!

Comments

[forleaving]

[Ronan's nervous energy was almost contagious but more than that it was sweet in a way. Adam wanted Ronan to be happy, even if he was a little skittish about all of this himself. He had worries, of course, little what ifs in the back of his mind. He just kept telling himself that everything was going to be alright; he just had a feeling it would be. He also just had to remind himself that Ronan had chosen him and was actively choosing him, no matter what else happened. Things were going to be alright. He was lucky to have Ronan, in so many ways, and he treasured him every day, no matter how far away they were from each other.

He smiled warmly in response to Ronan's question.]

I wouldn't have said it was okay in the first place if I didn't mean it.

[He might have done his hardest to pretend he was someone he wasn't at Harvard and that his origins weren't as awful as they really were, but he wouldn't lie about something like this. Especially not to Ronan. This was important and- he wanted things to work out.

Not enough people in Ronan's life had truly supported him and Adam wanted to be one of the ones who did. Ronan supported him, after all, had let him ramble and vent about his future and colleges and life choices even though Ronan was following a different path. Everybody in life had a unique path and Ronan's might not involve college but that didn't make him any less, even if Adam had scoffed about that choice before. He'd never thought Ronan was less. How could he when his boyfriend was the singular most fantastical person he knew? It was no wonder that he would be interested in someone who could do the same things. Adam wasn't on their level but he'd still found ways to make himself useful, ways to earn and work and feel like he was making something of himself.]

Relax.

[As if Ronan would be able to do, probably, but Adam was doing the best he could from so far away.]

What's your plan for tonight?

[threesecrets]

Okay.

[Ronan exhales, nodding in agreement and understanding as Adam reiterated that he wouldn't have said it if he hadn't meant it. And it wasn't that Ronan didn't trust him, it was just-- this was new territory. It felt like something that he shouldn't be allowed to have. The words were at least some reassurance that he wasn't mis-stepping here, somehow. Ronan might not entirely agree with the way that Adam rewrote his history, but it didn't really change the way he saw Adam-- it didn't make it so that Ronan didn't trust him.

He was still a comfort. Ronan would have much preferred to be able to hold his hand, lace their fingers together until Adam pulled the tension from him with his touch and his presence. But having him on video was something at least; it still helped. He smiled softly as Adam told him to relax and he does his best, rolling his shoulders to try and ease some of the pressure, and he does settle a little bit, exhaling and trying to calm his breath.]

I love you.

[He doesn't say it often enough, he knows. Not outloud, usually it's just in his head, in his heart. But somehow it feels like right now there's something to saying it, to making sure Adam remembers. That Ronan chose him first, and that he'd keep choosing him, even if he was choosing Kavinsky too.]

I don't know, really. I thought I'd mostly play it by ear. Although... I got him a few flowers. It's dumb, but-

[He rubs a hand against his scalp a little bit self-consciously, and then disappears off the screen for a moment, and when he returns it's with three roses. They're orange and tipped in red, impossibly vibrant, like flames shaped into petals. Long-stemmed, and Ronan hasn't trimmed off the thorns.]

Do you think it's okay? I know it's cheesy and shit.

[forleaving]

[Adam's smile softened, though stayed just as warm.]

I love you, too.

[It made him feel warm and full of hope and happiness to hear it. He didn't know if the effect would dissipate if they said it more often or if he'd always feel this way, every time, but he liked to think Ronan would always make him this happy. Adam just wished they were close enough to kiss or at least hold hands or- something.]

It's not dumb.

[As someone who'd given flowers before, Adam thought it was a very sweet gesture. He just wasn't sure if Kavinsky would agree. Adam didn't really know him- as in, at all- and his opinions of the other boy might not have been very high before, but times were changing.]

Flowers are a classic and they're very romantic. There's an entire language of flowers.

[Of course, he didn't expect Kavinsky to know anything about flowers, but it would just be an excuse for Ronan to teach him. If...Ronan knew, at least.]

[threesecrets]

[Ronan can't help the way that he smiles, a little bit flushed, warm just from hearing Adam say that he loved him. It was-- maybe this was strange, sitting here talking to Adam and telling him he loved him when he was getting ready to invite another boy over and try and tell him that he loved him too.

But it was the very fact that Adam was willing and understanding and encouraging that made it possible for Ronan to try. Though fuck but he wished they could even just hold hands. Just some sort of contact- Ronan was a creature of touch, it was the easiest way for him to express his feelings.]

I know. I mean, I googled it. Red is love and romance, orange is passion and desire, yellow is friendship and new beginnings. Though I guess these are a bit more complicated than just the single colors. The lady at the flower store said together it means something like.. telling someone you wont abandon them.

[Was there anything about him and Kavinsky that hasn't been complicated? But he wanted K to know that he meant it. That he wanted him to stay. It was saying it in words that he struggled with, but he meant it. The feelings still curled in his chest, had for longer than Ronan had known how to acknowledge.]

I didn't pick them for the meaning, but- I think it works. I just thought they looked like fire which made me think of him.

[He smiles at Adam a little bit sheepishly.]

When do you think you'll have a chance to visit?

[forleaving]

[The thought of Ronan googling the meaning of flowers and flower language warmed Adam's heart. It was sweet and it showed how much he cared. Adam was also aware of how complicated things had been between Kavinsky and Ronan before and that maybe mentioning flowers with the meaning of 'I won't abandon you' was more than just a mention.

As much as he was tempted to, he refrained from mentioning that flower language could get incredibly complicated and that in the past even spies and secret agents had used flower bouquets to pass messages. Of course, a lot of things could have secret messages, like the way you tied your shoes, but that wasn't relevant here.]

They're beautiful. I think he'll appreciate them.

[He hoped at least. He'd already considered the options. Best case scenario, Kavinsky accepted the flowers and said yes. Worst case, he laughed at Ronan and drove off. Adam was really hoping against the worst-case scenario; he didn't want to see Ronan's heart break.

He considered something for a moment, looking away to check his schedule and the calendar.]

I could drive down next weekend?

[Come down Friday night and leave Sunday evening so he'd be back in time for classes.]